an open letter to art garfunkel

dear art -
can i call you Art? or would you prefer Mr. Garfunkel? i've listened to too many of your records for formalities, sir, Art it is.
i grew up on the music you made with Simon. the first record that i listened to obsessively was your 1980 Concert in Central Park album which i absconded from my older sister -- i still remember her name written on the CD (in all lowercase), which i believe was gifted to her by a high school friend. i think it was Tommy Tsai.
i was in 5th grade, and i'm pretty positive that I was the only 11 year old in the greater Tri-Cities area who knew every word to "The Boxer". you were the soundtrack to my personal life, and your music has followed me since my first discovery of yours and Simon's music. i have favorites, i have ones that i skip upon hearing the first chord (namely "Kodachrome" and "I Am a Rock"). because your music released and your breakup was made permanent long before i was born, it became one of my missions in life to get my peers to enjoy your music. i have been mildly successful at this.
i have something to admit, though. to you in particular.
i get annoyed when you sing lead. you are just such a much better harmonizer (usually singing a third above Simon, where you belong) than you are a lead vocalist. this is perhaps why your solo career has been dismal compared to that of your friend Simon. whenever i hear your group's epic masterpiece single "Bridge Over Troubled Water" i enjoy every part until the bridge of the song comes on -- the part that begins, "sail on silvergirl..." it is a nice change of pace that Simon becomes the background vocalist, but i kind of just want the bridge to be over.
now, i don't want to accuse you of riding on Simon's coattails for the entirety of your group's tenure, but is that the reason why you broke up? did you feel emasculated by your bandmates' far superior talent as a leading vocalist? do you think this would've been different had the band been named "Garfunkel and Simon"?
as stated earlier, i lived my childhood with The Concert in Central Park album in tow and at times i could sense your bitterness towards Simon. in one of the speaking intros to your song "American Tune" you mentioned that (i'm paraphrasing from memory here) "This is a song that is one of the only ones in the show that is not a... a Paul Simon tune." what is that supposed to mean? listen to that recording again, Art. your tone is slightly snarky.
i'm assuming now, in 2010, you're a little more adjusted than you were in 1980. it is 30 years later after all. but still, bitter is not a good color on you.
i'm not even going to go into your hair style. that's an entirely different story.
with all that said, i will sing "At The Zoo" to my children. hold that in your heart.
your #1 fan in Generation Y,
Sarah E. Weakley

p.s. to all my readers in the blogging world, listen to more Simon and Garfunkel. go on grooveshark.com and listen to the whole catalogue. simple songwriting, beautiful melodies, well thought out lyrics. i won't give you my favorite songs -- i want to you to come to your own conclusions.