reminders

because i have a few minutes before i go to work, and also because i was reminded of a friend who is far away from me by a song, i realize that most of the songs i hear are attached to people. i might not see this people that often, or at all anymore, but they will always have those memories. you should know that. the list:

joy- say my name by destiny's child. and billie jean by michael jackson because she busts out the best moves to that.
alyssa - push it by salt n pepa.
andrew smith- radiohead. and anything i wouldn't normally listen to.
andrew winters- like i love you by JT.
erica lewis- santeria by sublime. she will have that ringtone until she dies, i think.
jamie deyette, roommate sophomore year- gold digger by kanye west. again, ringtone that woke me up every morning at 6.
neil- out loud by dispatch.
will crowley (my favorite ex-boyfriend)- green eyes by travis.
nathan roueche- cleaning windows by van morisson.
richie withycombe (least favorite ex-boyfriend)- crazy game by O.A.R. don't worry, he didn't ruin the song for me.
andy- too many to mention. but always jeremy by pearl jam. he does an impressive eddie vedder impression.
brelin- love medley in moulin rouge. and rainbow connection by me first and the gimme gimmes.
mom- at the zoo by simon and garfunkel. mandy by barry manilow. and never gonna give you up by rick astley. oh, and anything by hall and oates.
pop- aqualung by jethro tull and penny lane by the beatles (for the line: he likes to keep his fire engine clean/it's a clean machine)

still in love (possibly lust)

as i was face-stalking (what people my age do on facebook when they look at their 'friends' who they will never actually see again), i ran across the boy i had a crush on for five years of my childhood. as my usual m.o. as a kid, i had a few friends that were girls, but in class there were two boys that i hung out with all the time...and then i realized that i was in love with one of them. this changed the dynamic between us, as i was vaulted head-first into the awkward middle school feelings of female inadequacy in the face of the opposite sex. a lovely time.

childhood progressed, elementary school crush turned into daydreams of us getting married in a big church with lots of people around/coaching our children's soccer team/not having any dogs. normal stuff to think about when you're ten. there was a period in seventh grade that i wavered in my love for the boy-who-shall-remain-nameless, but for one more solid year my love remained.

and then i realized that i was a loser. i sucked at sports, and he was great at sports. oh well, can't win 'em all.

but at least i had enough balls to fess up to this right after graduation. you know, the part where you hug everyone even if you hate them? i went up to him, gave him a big hug, and said: "i just wanted to know that i had a huge crush on you from third to eighth grade. we were gonna get married. but don't worry, i'm not in love with you now." to which he said so plainly and enthusiastically: "REALLY?! i was in love with you too!"

that was all i needed. for some reason that was the perfect thing to say- obviously nothing ever would have come from that, but it's still nice to think about. i guess some sort of validation for those terrible middle school feelings. sometimes they just get away.

and damn, he got more attractive.